


Scars of the past

by holdinghearts



Category: Divergent (Movies), Divergent - All Media Types, Divergent Series - Veronica Roth
Genre: F/M, No divergent, i'll figure out some tags as i go, set before tris
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-14
Updated: 2018-02-21
Packaged: 2019-02-02 00:42:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12716247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holdinghearts/pseuds/holdinghearts
Summary: Catalina went through her own hell in Candor before choosing dauntless. She's just a Candor running away from her past trying to be someone new.





	1. The beginning

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry the summary is garbage but I hope you like it.

“Liar!” Her mother shouted at her over and over again as she felt a searing pain on her back. “This is your fault your lies killed him” Her mother growled then she was gone and Catalina felt a burning searing pain lick at her skin.

“Cat!” Christina said shaking the girl awake she had had the same nightmare often, but it wasn’t a nightmare not really it was a memory of the night her life started to change. Christina was Cat’s only friend she was two years younger and had dark skin and soft warm brown eyes her hair fell in soft curls to her shoulders she had become like a little sister to Cat since Christina’s mother Ali had taken her in. 

“I’m okay.” Cat said her heart was racing and her pale skin was damp and felt clammy.

“Same dream?” Christina asked sitting on the edge of Cats bed. She nodded her head.

“What time is it?” Cat asked when Christina yawned.

“4 a.m.” Christina answered.

“Go back to sleep I’m alright.” Cat sighed they didn’t need to be up until 7 to get ready for Cat’s choosing ceremony.

“I don’t think I want to I mean I want to spend as much time with you as I can before you leave.” The younger girl said shrugging.

“What makes you so sure I’m leaving?” Cat asked raising an eyebrow.

“It’s pretty obvious really you don’t belong in Candor.” Christina said bluntly “And I mean that in the best way your honest but not like the rest of Candor and you don’t deserve the stuff people think about you after what happen 4 years ago.” Christina was right Cat wasn’t candor not since that night and she didn’t want to stay in Candor the rest of her life not the with the way they looked at her like she was fragile like she’d snap like her mother and worst of all was the pity.

“So where do you think I belong? What do you think I got on my aptitude test?” Cat asked with a small smile.

“Dauntless. You are the bravest person I know.” Christina smiled. She was right that’s what Cat had got on the test. Christina yawned again.

“Go to bed Chris.” Cat said softly climbing out of bed.

“Are you going for a run?” Christina asked while Cat dug through her dresser.

“Yes go to sleep I’ll still be here when you wake up.” Cat said changing into her black tights and white t-shirt. Christina nodded and crawled back into bed.  
Cat quietly wandered down the stairs knowing that Ali wouldn’t be up yet. Once outside Cat took off running she did this every time she had the nightmare it helped clear her head and she liked the burn she felt when she ran. This morning it was colder than usual fall was slowly approaching and the brisk wind bit at her skin but she didn’t mind. She let her thoughts wander while she ran thinking about what today would hold. Today was her choosing ceremony the day she would choose where shed spend the rest of her life. She had gotten dauntless oh her aptitude test and that was where she was going to transfer to where she would get her chance to start over where no one would know who she was. That was what she’d wanted since that night.

Cat remembered that night like it was yesterday and not four years ago. She was just 12 years old when she had lost her father he had been attacked by a factionless man. A few weeks later her mother began to drink a lot and blamed Cat then one day she snapped. Her mother blamed her for her father’s death saying it was god punishing them for Cat’s dishonesty; sure her mother was right Cat had problems with being Candor sometimes she’d lie about her grades and hid disciplinary reports from her parents. Her father often found out and chastised Cat but he was kind and seemed to know that Cat wasn’t meant for Candor he encouraged her to be different he would often run with her when she was upset. Her mother was different though she wanted her daughter to be Candor and when her father died and her mother snapped she had fought with Cat calling her a liar and the she hit Cat throwing her to the ground her mother kept yelling liar over and over pulling out a knife she had even decided to caver the word into her daughters back across her shoulders. Cat had passed out from the searing pain and when she woke up the house was on fire. Cat’s mother died in the fire but cat had managed to climb through a window escaping with just a burn up her calf. When the sun was fully in the sky Cat ran back home knowing that soon the quiet streets of candor would soon be bustling.

“Catalina I made your favorite breakfast.” Ali said and Cat wanted to cringe Ali was the only person she let call her that.

“Thank you.” Cat said grabbing some pancakes sitting at the table next to Christina.

“I am going to miss you Catalina.” Ali said sitting across from the girls.

“Thank you Ali for everything. I’m going to miss you too.” Cat smiled she was so greatful for Ali and Christina they were the only two people in Candor who treated Cat like a  
normal person.

“You are going to kick so much ass in dauntless!” Christina grinned.

“Christina! Language!” Ali snapped at her daughter.

“What I’m just being honest.” Christina grinned earning a glare from her mom making Cat laugh.

“Go get ready girls we don’t want to be late for the ceremony.” Ali said clearing the table. Cat and Christina made their way up the stairs to get ready.

Within ten minutes Cat was ready to go her pale blond hair was tied back into a bun she had chosen to wear black dress pants and a nice white blouse everyone except for abnegation dressed up for the choosing ceremony. Cat was extremely nervous in a matter of hours she’d be in a new faction starting a new life. When the girls were ready the met Ali downstairs and made their way to the ceremony. The trip was silent sadness seeped into the air Ali and Christina would truly miss Catalina and she would miss them but they were excited for her. The Ceremony droned on the leader of Amity was conducting the ceremony Cat wasn’t paying much attention to what was going on she just listened to the people whispering about her from behind.

“Hey how about you shut up and pay attention to the ceremony.” Cat said turning around and quietly snapping at them. They looked at her in shock with fear in their eyes. She sighed and turn back around Christina grinned at her.

“Catalina Belore” Joanna the Amity leader called her name this was it; it was her turn to choose her future.

Cat walked up to the stage looking around the room filled with people and color Erudite’s clad in blue, the bright reds and yellows of amity, the clean cut black and white of candor, the grays of abnegation and the black of Dauntless. Her gaze focused on Ali and Christina in Candor smiling at her. She was handed the ceremonial knife and looked at the bowls in front of her she cut her palm feeling the familiar sting of a blade and held her hand above the Dauntless bowls hearing her blood sizzle as it fell.

“Dauntless.” Joanna said and that was it Cat could finally free herself of Candor she could start over. The cheers of Dauntless rang out and she quickly joined her new faction excited. When the ceremony ended everyone in the dauntless faction started running out the door an Cat followed her heart pounding she moved easily with the dauntless crowd coming up to the train. She followed them on the train. Standing on the edge of the train car Cat leaned over and helped one of the other girls on she was Amity in a bright red dress.

“Thank you!” The girl said with a grin she was shorter than Cat with a soft round face, long black hair and tanned skin. “My name is Amelia, but I might change it.” She said holding out her hand.

“Phoenix.” Cat said grinning she was excited that she’d never have to be Catalina again she could finally be someone different.

“That sounds dauntless as hell!” Amelia said grinning. “You’re from Candor right?” 

“Do you ever stop talking Amelia?” An Amity guy said coming up beside her Phoenix grinned he stood about a foot taller than she did he looked a lot like Amelia with his back hair cut short and his tanned round face. He was definitely taller than her and looked stronger looking too.

“Oh shush Stage!” Amelia said “Phoenix this is my twin brother Stage.”

“Stage that’s a very Amity name if I’ve ever heard one.” Phoenix said chuckling.

“Maybe but Phoenix isn’t a very Candor name.” He said with a shrug.

“That’s because it’s not, but neither am I” Phoenix said.

“Hey guys it looks like everyone’s jumping.” Amelia said glancing out the door. Phoenix looked over and saw they were approaching a roof top and the dauntless members were jumping out of the train. Phoenix was excited.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me!” Stage groaned.

“What are you scared?” Phoenix said preparing herself for the jump. Stage shook his head no but he looked terrified. Phoenix smiled at him and Amelia before jumping, the amity twins followed suit. Phoenix hit the roof her heart was pounding as the rest of the initiates hit the roof a man called them over to the ledge. He was tall dressed in all black he look strong and was a little intimidating with maze like tattoos on his neck and his arms several piercings adorned his ears and two above his brow. His hair was short and shaved on the sides slicked back with gel. 

“Alright listen up I’m Eric one of the leaders here at Dauntless. If you want to enter Dauntless this is the way in and if you don’t have the guts to jump you don’t belong here.” Eric said his voice deep and indifferent. 

“What’s at the bottom?” an Erudite girl asked.

“I guess you’ll find out or not.” Eric shrugged. Phoenix knew there had to be something at the bottom they wouldn’t just kill all their initiates not that it mattered she wasn’t afraid of heights. “who’s first?” everyone looked around but Phoenix grinned.

“Me” She said walking up to the leader who if she was being honest with herself was handsome.

“You sure candor it’s a little harder than running your mouth.” Eric said smirking at Phoenix as she stood up on the ledge.

“I’m not candor and it seems like dauntless have no problems running their mouths either.” Phoenix said shrugging before diving into the hole the last thing she saw before hitting the net at the bottom was Eric’s face that looked deadly. Maybe pissing of a leader wasn’t the best idea she’d ever had.

“Here” A man said holding his hand out to her. He was almost as handsome as Eric he was a little shorter with short brown hair and dark brown eyes. Phoenix rolled out of the net with his help. “What’s your name?”

“Phoenix.” She said like it’s the name shed always had. The man smiled warmly.


	2. Knives

“First jumper Phoenix!” He called out and everyone cheered Phoenix grinned ear to ear. Another initiate came down hitting the net it was an erudite boy, a few more people came down three more erudite, two more candor, four Amity and two abnegation. Phoenix was thrilled to see Amelia and Stage.

“You’re crazy.” Stage said walking up to Phoenix. “Eric was so angry he pushed the next jumper off.” Phoenix cringed she felt a little bad for the kid that got pushed off the roof. 

“Initiates, my name is Four I usually work in intelligence but for the 12 weeks I’ll be the transfers trainer, Eric will be overseeing training as well” He said gesturing to a dark haired girl. “ This Is Lauren she’ll be training the dauntless-born and this is where we split seeing as dauntless-born won’t need a tour. Follow me.” He said leading the transfers.

“Eric and Four training us? They could probably split us in half.” Amelia said.

“Four like the number?” A candor boy asked.

“Exactly” Four said leading the group to a place he called ‘The Pit’ “as you can see this is the center of life here at Dauntless.” Phoenix looks around in awe ‘the pit’ was incredible it was huge and she couldn’t see the other end from where she stood. All sorts of places were carved into the cave like walls and dauntless members were buzzing about some stopping to take a look at the initiates.

“This is incredible.” Amelia said Phoenix saw Four glance at Amelia and grin. He continued walking leading them to ‘the chasm.’

“Amelia you were wrong this is what’s really incredible.” Phoenix said walking across the bridge a river gushing below she could feel the missed from the roaring water. There was a dangerous yet calming feeling in the air around the chasm.

“I stand corrected.” Amelia said her eyes widened.

“The chasm reminds us of the fine line between bravery and stupidity if you jump or fall you die it’s happened before and it’ll happen again.” Four shouted over the roaring water. Four showed them the cafeteria and the training room before taking them to the dorm.

“This is where you be staying for your initiation.” He said leading us into a large room full of beds and he showed us the communal bathroom. Phoenix cringed at the thought of being so out in the open. “You have ten minutes to change and get to dinner.” Four said gesturing to the table full of clothes each stack had a name on them.  
Phoenix quickly grabbed the stack that had the name ‘Catalina’ on it; they must have gotten files on every transfer to set this up. Phoenix crumpled up the paper with her old name on it and threw it away. She found a bed in the back of the room unoccupied. Amelia took the bed next to her and Stage took the one in front of her. Phoenix looked through the simple stack of clothes some pants and shorts to train in some tank tops shed probably never wear two t shirt, a jacket, a pair of boots and a few other things. She grabbed a pair of pants and a t shirt and changed with her back facing the wall she couldn’t hide the burns on her leg but she was sure as hell going to hide the scars on her back the only thing she couldn’t change or run from was the scars.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a shy Candor.” One of the erudite boys said the one who Eric pushed off the roof; Phoenix thought his name was Nick. He glanced over at Amelia who was changing as well.

“I’m not Candor I’m dauntless.” Phoenix hissed.

“Hey man leave her alone and quit looking at my sister.” Stage growled Nick chuckled and walked away.

“I didn’t know Amity’s could be so confrontational.” Phoenix said smiling.

“You said it best Nix I’m not Amity I’m dauntless.” Stage said shrugging. He was right she thought no one here was their old faction here they were dauntless.

“Plus amity couldn’t wait to get rid of us!” Amelia said causing the three of them to laugh. 

After changing the trio made their way to the dining hall Phoenix was still in awe of the dark cave like walls in dauntless. When they got to the cafeteria is was full of people covered in black with tattoos and piercings they all looked so strong and different. All of the tables were full of people and food they found three spots at a table next to Four. Phoenix loaded her plate with food when Eric came into the room followed by a familiar man. He had dark skin and graying black hair he had tattoos on his neck the mirrored the ones on Eric’s, they were probably leadership tattoos. She had met him before 4 years ago he was younger then on a dauntless patrol, he had been the one to find her half conscious in front of the burning house Phoenix still remembered him whispering “Be brave” to her as he drove her to Erudite hospital.

“Initiates stand! I’m your leader Max” He said cheerfully “Welcome to Dauntless the warrior faction tasked to protect this city and all it inhabitants here we believe in ordinary acts of bravery and the courage to stand up for one another. Respect that, do us proud.” He said and everyone cheered banging their cups against the table. 

“I thought amity was the only was the only faction that didn’t eat meat.” A small Erudite boy chuckled looking at Amelia’s plate she had gotten everything but meat.

“I thought Erudite knew everything! Not everyone in Amity is a vegetarian but some are.” Amelia said and everyone laughed.

“No they’re all just banjos loving hippies.” Phoenix said and Stage threw a small piece of bread at her.

“How dare you! Amelia and I brought so much shame to our poor parents with our terrible banjo skills.” Stage said everyone started laughing again.

“I’m Nate.” The erudite said.

“Hi Nate I’m Phoenix this is Amelia and her brother Stage.” Phoenix said introducing herself. “Now please pass me so cake.”

After all the excitement all Phoenix wanted to do was crawl into bed and get some sleep. Except that didn’t happen she had the nightmare again waking up in a cold sweat. She stretched out and grabbed her clothes knowing she wouldn’t be able to sleep more. Everyone else was still fast asleep giving her the perfect opportunity to shower privately before wandering the compound; Four had told them they couldn’t leave without a full dauntless member supervising which meant she couldn’t go running outside. She walked around until she came across what Four said was the training room, it was 6:00 in the morning so she had two hours until she needed to be there but she saw the track and couldn’t help herself she ran for about an hour when she noticed someone had walked in.

“Initiate!” Eric yelled from the door Phoenix took a deep breath and jogged over to him “Being early to your first day doesn’t earn you any points or impress me.”

“I wasn’t trying to I just couldn’t sleep and quite frankly I don’t care if I impress you.” She said shrugging.

“First lesson Candor keep your mouth shut, second you always want to impress me I control your future.” Eric said moving closer to her.

“I’m not Candor I’m Dauntless.” Phoenix growled Eric chuckled.

“That’s funny, you better get this through your head quick Candor you are far from Dauntless.” Eric spat before she could say anything else Four walked in. 

“Get back to the dorm initiate we need to set up.” Four said Phoenix nodded.

Phoenix made her way back to the dorm after stopping at the cafeteria to grab breakfast grabbing a muffin for her friends as well. She sat on her bed annoyed that Eric had interrupted her run and got under her skin. She picked at her muffin until Four came into the room banging a pipe against the wall. 

“Get up you all need to be in the training room in ten minutes, this is the first and only time I’ll wake you up you are expected in the training room at 7 every morning.” Four shouted waking everyone up.

“Fucking hell what time is it?” Amelia groaned getting out of bed.

“6:50.” Phoenix said glancing at the clock on the wall.

“How long have you been awake?” Amelia asked getting dressed.

“Two hours I got you some breakfast.” Phoenix said handing her a muffin and tossing one to Stage.

“You are a saint. Are you sure you aren’t from Amity.” Amelia said taking a bite of the muffin.

“I’m sure yellow really isn’t my color.” Phoenix said grinning following her friends to the training room.

“Initiates we break down our training into stages the first is physical the second is mental and the third final stage you’ll be required to use what you’ve learned there will be a break between each stage. You will be rank against the Dauntless born even though you will be training separately.” Four instructed the group.

“Your rank will depend on your position here at Dauntless the higher you rank the better than your jobs so prove yourself or spend the rest of your life guarding the fence.” Eric said his eyes falling on Phoenix her stomach dropped at the idea of her fate being in Eric’s hands.

“We train from 7 to 6 with a break for lunch and your evening will be free. You each will receive points to spend on anything you need spend them wisely.” Four said.

“Your first task today is a simple one you will learn how to throw knives.” Eric said

Four had spent the morning showing them techniques and teaching them about the knives they would be throwing after lunch the initiates were lined up in front of targets.  
Phoenix held her knife in her hand and looked at it carefully it had been through years of use she could only imagine how many times it had been used and sharpened. She like the weight of it and the way it just felt right in her hand. She positioned herself in front of her target and mimicked some of the techniques she was shown. Her first three throws were off target and sloppy but the more she threw the better she’d gotten by her 8th knife she had managed to hit the target everywhere she aimed. She grinned continuing to hit the target perfectly.

“You are really good at this.” Amelia said throwing her knife missing her target she groaned frustrated.

“Here stand like this with your feet apart and use your wrist more.” Phoenix said helping Amelia hit the target when she did she squealed happily catching Eric’s attention.

“Hey Four come look at this Candor seems to thinks she’s good enough to train the other Initiates” Eric said causing everyone to stop throwing their knives and watch. “Do you think you’d be a better trainer than Four and I Candor?”

“I’m Dauntless.” Phoenix said softly she didn’t want to take Eric’s bait but she also didn’t want to be reminded of her old faction.

“What was that initiate?” Eric asked moving closer to her Four standing behind him silently telling Phoenix to keep her mouth shut.

“I’m Dauntless.” She snapped back louder and confidently.

“Well then if you think you’re so good and so Dauntless then prove it how about we have Four go up to the target. Get as close as you can without hitting him or you’re Factionless.” Eric says and Four moves forward looking uneasy obviously not fond of the Idea.

“No.” Phoenix starts “If you want me to throw knives at someone why aren’t you brave enough to stand in front of the target.” She pushed earning a dark look and a smirk from Eric she thought it would only be fair for Eric to risk his own safety instead of Fours. He was the one baiting her pushing her.

“Alright, But if you hit me you won’t be factionless you’ll be dead.” He growled at her. “You’ve got 3 shots princess make them count.” Four handed Phoenix 3 knives she took the first in her hand and felt a little panic dead was better than factionless sure, but she wasn’t sure she wanted to be either. It was far to late to back down now she took a deep breath and threw the knife; it landed a few inches from Eric’s shoulder. “You can get closer than that initiate.” The second knife she threw landed above Eric’s head almost touching his hair. 

“You needed a bit of a trim Eric.” Four chuckled earning a glare from Eric. Phoenix threw the last knife and maybe the people in Candor were right maybe she was going crazy. It landed between his thighs dangerously close to the seam of his black jeans. Eric looked down and then back up at her scowling.

“Not bad, initiate points for bravery, but not as many as you’re losing for opening your mouth.” Eric said. “We’re done for the day clear out, except for you.” He said looking over at Phoenix, her heart stopped she knew what she had done was stupid. Everyone left and Eric even waved Four out of the room.

“What can I do for you boss?” She said trying to lighten the dark mood that clouded the room. Eric didn’t say anything he just grabbed her roughly shoving her to the target bored pinning her there. She felt a shiver rush down her spine.

“You ever pull something like that again your dead do you understand me?” Eric growled.

“I’m not afraid of you.” She said staring up at him. It was a lie but she wasn’t going to back down she wasn’t going to show weakness in front of some bully with too much power. He stared down at her bright green eyes filled with defiance. 

“You should be.” He said letting her go and walking away. She angrily made her way to the dining hall where she was met with Amelia and Stage’s curious looks.

“You have a death wish, we made friends with an insane person.” Stage said when Phoenix sat at the table she laughed.

“Seriously though you threw knives at Eric! No one does that!” Amelia said.

“You probably shouldn’t have aimed so close to his pride and joy either.” Four said making the three of them turn to him he was sitting near the end of the table. He was smiling oddly enough Phoenix didn’t think he was even capable of actually smiling. “You did good today initiate stupid but good.” He said before picking up his tray and leaving.

“Fours right you can’t get that close to a leader’s manhood without being stupid!” Nate joked.

“You all know he deserved it leader or not that dude is a prick.” Phoenix said defending herself. She glanced towards the doors where Eric was now standing he was openly glaring at her.

“Well Phoenix it was nice knowing you I will be sobbing by the Chasm after he throws you over.” Amelia joked looking over at Eric as well.

“So what do you think the chances are of Eric actually killing her?” Stage asked and Phoenix rolled her eyes.

“Pretty high from what I’ve heard Eric doesn’t like to be challenged.” Nate smirked.

“You guys are ridiculous.” Phoenix said laughing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading I would love criticism and thoughts


	3. Tattoos and other things that mark the skin

The next few days flew by quickly Phoenix slept without a problem and training was going well. Four and Eric had been teaching them fighting techniques in the morning apparently Eric decided to take a break on weapons training for now. Phoenix spared with Amelia while their trainers walked around adjusting everyone’s moves and stances.

“Think they’re ready to fight?” Eric asked as when they all returned from lunch.

“Not even close.” Four sighed.

“Alright initiate first jumper, last jumper in the ring! This will be your first ranked fight.” Eric said everyone gathered around the mats. Phoenix stepped on the mat across from another Candor transfer his name was Ian and he was twice her size, she had only ever met him once in Candor. She was nervous to say the least as he circled her she wasn’t sure if she even had a slim chance of winning.

“How long do we fight for?” Ian asked.

“Until one of you concedes or can no longer fight” Four said. Ian grinned his eyes full of malice.

“You look familiar have we met before?” Ian said trying to distract her as he lunges at her she dodged him just barely but he was quick to recover punching her in her side. She hunched over in pain and Ian hit her again. She put her arms up frustrated she blocked the next hit. Phoenix ran at Ian remembering what Four had told her about how she should use her height to her advantage and try to wear her opponent out since she wasn’t as strong as him. Ian was shocked by her and took a step back before trying to hit her again but this time Phoenix jumped out of his way. They did this a few more times dancing around each other.

“I’m getting bored finish this.” Eric said crossing his arms over his chest. Phoenix glanced over at him glaring, but that had been a mistake Ian lunged at her again grabbing the collar of her loose t shirt before she could step out of his reach. He pulled her t shirt pulling her close enough to land a punch to her jaw. Phoenix tried to pull away from the firm grasp he had on her shirt the fabric ripped freeing her causing her to stumble.

“Now I remember who you are” Ian said Phoenix’s shirt was torn and her scars peeked out “Crazy Catalina” When he said her old nick name something in Phoenix snapped she turned around and attacked him he had been cut off guard and she had been able to land several fury filled punches to his ribs and face but it didn’t last long when Ian kicked her sending her sprawling to the floor. She hit the ground hard her body aching as the room span.

“Winner Ian. Who’s next?” Eric announced Phoenix could hear a smugness in his voice he had wanted to see her fail. Phoenix decided that’s the last time he’d let that happen, the last time she’d let Eric revel in her failure. Phoenix got to her feet her shirt hung in tatters when she looked around everyone was staring at her in shock and pity they had seen her scars it made her feel sick. 

“Come on I’ll take you to the infirmary.” Four said leading her out of the room Phoenix desperately tried to fix her shirt to cover her scars and her sports bra. “And don’t be ashamed of your scars they mean you survived your fight embrace them.” Four said leaving her in the infirmary.

“You okay Nix?” Amelia said walking into the infirmary the doctor was currently examining her ribs making sure they weren’t broke so far she just had minor bruises and scrapes plus a nice black eye and 3 stitches above her eyebrow.

“Ya I’m fine.” Phoenix said sighing she was still upset about losing the fight.

“Those bruises really bring out the green in your eyes.” Stage said coming in and leaning against the door frame.

“Leave her alone Stage.” His sister chastised him. “Anyway we came to check on you and see if you were feeling up to getting a tattoo.” 

“Absolutely! Just let me go change and shower.” Phoenix grinned looking down at her tattered bloody clothes.

Phoenix stood under the hot water she had been right the dorm was completely empty so she could shower in peace. Unfortunately it was a very peaceful shower when she started thinking about Eric. He was cold callous and sparked up her anger. She had already managed to get herself on his radar which she knew would make initiation harder. She was lost in thought when she heard someone walk into the room; She grabbed her towel quickly wrapping it around herself when Ian had appeared with a towel draped loosely around his waist. He had a bruise on his cheek and one on his side she may not have one but she at least put up a fight. She pulled her towel tighter around herself.

“What’s the matter Candor are you shy?” Ian asked noticing her gripping her towel tightly. He let his own towel drop from his waist. Phoenix rolled her eyes at him it was one thing for Eric, a leader to mess with her but she wasn’t about to let Ian do it. Not again.

“Dauntless, Ian I am Dauntless. I think I proved that earlier. Oh and Ian maybe you should be a little shy.” Phoenix said sweetly squinting at him before walking out of the room. Phoenix got dressed and made her way to the pit to find her friends.

“Phoenix!” Stage called from the inside of the tattoo shop.

“Hey Stage.” She said walking into the shop she looked around at all of the art on the walls.

“Amelia’s in the back getting hers now.” Stage said excitedly Phoenix walked around the shop stopping in front of an interesting art piece. A man with a pale blue Mohawk and dark brown eyes walk up to them he was covered in tattoos and a few years older than Stage and Phoenix.

“Hi I’m Arroe I work here yada yada tattoo artist yada yada what can I do for you two?” He said grinning.

“I want the dauntless flames on my shoulder.” Stage said confidently and Arroe rolled his eyes.

“You’re going to have to wait for Tori then because I’m not doing another dauntless flames tattoo today.” Arroe said. 

“Who drew this?” Phoenix asked touching a picture of a tree that had lost all of its leaves it looked strong and powerful.

“That would be yours truly.” Arroe said proudly.

“This is what I want.” She said almost in awe it was a beautiful piece. “I want it to cover my back.”

“You are definitely coming with me nobody has let me tattoo that on them to Amity they all bitch.” Arroe said leading Phoenix into the back. He had her sit down while he finished setting up. “So what’s your name or should I call you initiate?” He said chuckling.

“Phoenix.” She said awkwardly sitting on a stool.

“You were the first jumper. That’s a pretty cool thing to be. Ok I’m ready I need you to take off your shirt and bra and lay on the table.” He instructs.

“You know I don’t usually take my shirt off until at least the third date.” Phoenix joked she was a little uncomfortable about taking her shirt off but she thought of what four said she wouldn’t let the scars control her not anymore.

“Well I do tend to have a certain effect on people.” He said laughing after a few minutes Arroe had started her tattoo not saying a thing about her scars Phoenix tensed a bit at the pain from the needle. “So Phoenix, first jumper, can I assume you’re a transfer? I mean I think I’d remember a cute blonde named Phoenix living here.”

“Yes from Candor.” Phoenix said.

“So Phoenix, first jumper, candor transfer I have been hearing this rumor around dauntless that one of the initiates threw fucking Knives at Eric and I am dying to know if it’s true.” He said continuing his work.

“It’s uh true. She was helping one of her friends and Eric got all bent out of shape and demanded she throw knives at Four she said it was only fair if Eric stood in front of the target and Ya it was really intense.” Phoenix said trying to pretend she had just witnessed the incident.

“We’ll probably find the poor girl dead in the chasm by morning.” Arroe joked and Phoenix tensed.

“I hope not.” Phoenix whispered.

“Well it looks like we’re done Phoenix, first jumper, Candor transfer, tree tattoo bearer.” He said helping her up to look at her tattoo.

“My name keeps getting longer and longer doesn’t it?” She grins at him before examining his work. It was strong and beautiful covering up most of her scars which she had   
been thrilled Arroe didn’t ask about them. “It’s beautiful thank you.”

“That looks great Nix!” Amelia said walking into the small room.

“You are very welcome Nix. See that’s shorter Nix, I like it.” Arroe said bandaging her up. “This will be sore for a couple of days. Well you know if you’re not dead by dawn and remember throwing knives at Eric is not good for your health.” He said walking out of the room. Phoenix sighed of course this was now going to be what she was known for.

“So Phoenix can I ask you about something?” Amelia asked sitting next to Phoenix waiting for Stage Phoenix nodded “How did you get those scars?”

“My mother.” Phoenix answered sighing she knew she’d have to explain the scars eventually “I wasn’t Candor enough for her so she decided to give me a reminder.”

“I’m so sorry Nix.” Amelia said softly putting her hand on Phoenix’s shoulder trying to comfort her friend.

“Don’t be she was right I’m not Candor.” Phoenix shrugged and Amelia nodded she didn’t push the subject anymore which Phoenix was thankful for.

The trio called it a night after Stage got his dauntless flame Phoenix was grateful to lay down and rest her aching body. Unfortunately it didn’t last long; she was woken up by her nightmare again. She was so frustrated that it kept happening that she could only go maybe a week without that damned nightmare. She quickly got dressed and headed to the training room; for once she wasn’t going to run she was going to practice her fighting. She threw several punches trying to mimic what Eric and Four had showed her she wasn’t going to lose another fight. Phoenix hit the punching bag a couple of times her hand hurt with every punch hitting the hard bag.

“You can’t throw a punch half as well as you can throw a knife.” Eric said coming up behind her startling her she hadn’t heard him come in. “Maybe you should’ve picked Amity Initiate” he said touching the tree tattoo on her bare back she had decided to just wear a sports bra which she was now regretting. Eric’s touch sent a shiver down her spine as his fingers gently touched her scar. “because you’ll keep getting your ass kicked if you keep hitting like that.”

“You know Eric I thought you were supposed to teach us not mock us.” She snapped at him.

“I can do both.” He shrugged.

“Wow thanks for the help.” Phoenix said sarcastically hitting the bag harder.

“You are going to fail.” Eric said watching her closely.

“Again thank you for your phenomenal encouraging words.” She spat “I have no plans on failing.”

“You will if you don’t stop throwing sloppy punches.” Eric said stepping closer to her.

“You should’ve been Candor Eric because you don’t know when to stop talking.” She snaps hitting the bag harder she was getting really tired of listening to him. 

“I’m going to ignore that Initiate.” He said stepping up behind her. “You’re small so you’re going to need to use your whole body. Spread your feet apart.” She obeys and moves her feet apart “Keep your arms up they’re your best defense” he moves her arms in the right position and moves his hand to her hips feeling her tense up. “Keep tension in your abdominal and hips. Now take a shot” he said.

Phoenix concentrated on the punching bag trying to ignore the lingering feeling of his strong calloused hand on her hips. She hit the bag and watched it sway her hand still stung but not as bad as before. Eric watched her muscles move and her blonde hair sway. 

“Thank you.” She said looking up at him.

“Ya well it won’t be worth much if you end up useless on the fence.” He said before walking out of the room Phoenix hit the bag frustrate he was so confusing he had helped her and been almost nice and then he had to go and be an ass.


	4. Fun and Games

“Nix!” Stage called to her from the door the rest of the initiates must have been getting up. “Do you want to come get Breakfast with Amelia and me?” Phoenix jogged to him.

“Do you always get up early and train?” Amelia said yawning.

“Not always just when I can’t sleep.” Phoenix said grabbing a plate and filling it with food.

“Don’t let her fool you she’s just trying to get a leg up on us.” Stage joked and Phoenix rolled her eyes.

“Well if that’s the case maybe you should get up early and train.” Phoenix said and stage looked at her in mock shock.

“And give up my precious sleep? Never!” Stage said.

After they finished breakfast the trio made their way to the training room. When everyone had come into the training room Four had ordered them to follow him up to the roof. Phoenix grinned when they got to the roof and she saw the targets, they were back to weapons training.

“For the next week you will have weapons training before lunch and after you will be fighting we’ll have pairings on the board.” Four said before starting to teach them the ins and outs of the rifle they’d be using. Phoenix followed his every word.

Four had handed them all a rifle and had them Start shooting at the target. Phoenix’s first shot was her worse, she hadn’t quite expected the rifle to kick back Four had made it look so easy. Phoenix swore shooting again this time more prepared for the kick but she had barley hit the target. She glanced over at her friends Four was helping Amelia adjust her aim and Stage was already hitting the target close to the center. She shot a few more times mimicking what Stage was doing and managed to do a little better before they broke for lunch. On the way to the Cafeteria they passed the board with their current rank and Phoenix cringed she was near the bottom her friends were just barely above her.

“Your rank is going to get so much better with your shooting skills. You won’t need any early morning training.” Phoenix said nudging Stage.

“Ya and Amelia’s rank will go up to with all the flirting she’s doing with Four.” Stage said and Amelia turned bright red.

“Shut up!” Amelia snapped at her brother and Phoenix laughed.

“Don’t listen to him go get number boy girl he’s cute as hell!” Phoenix said causing her friend to laugh and earning a glare from Stage.

After lunch the initiates got ready for their fights stretching and seeing who they were paired up against. Phoenix was paired up with Dylan an Erudite and Ian’s best friend she was beginning to think Eric or Four had it out for her. Amelia was paired against a large Erudite girl named Max and Stage was paired with a poor Candor half his size name Zack. Amelia was up first for the size difference Phoenix was surprised how evenly matched the two were she figured the work in Amity helped Amelia and Stage with strength and endurance. Phoenix envied how well Amelia moved dodging Max like she had been doing this her whole life. She had thought Amelia was going to win until Max got the upper hand and knocked her to the ground a couple more good kicks and Amelia conceded. 

“Are you okay?” Phoenix said kneeling beside her friend. Amelia looked disappointed and Stage looked uncomfortable seeing his sister bruised in a heap on the ground.

“Phoenix you’re up next Stage take her to the infirmary.” Four said.

Phoenix walked up to the mat facing Dylan, She was almost certain that he could probably drop her with one hit but she wasn’t going to go down that easy. Not again, not with Eric watching she wouldn’t prove him right. Phoenix took the first shot punching him hard in his chin catching him off guard. Angry, he jumped at her and hit her hard in the ribs making her stumble but she straightened herself back up. She took another shot hitting him in his nose hearing a crunch, while he was distracted she tried to kick him but that was a mistake he grabbed her leg and threw her to the ground knocking the wind out of her. She lay on the matt gasping.

“Get up initiate.” Eric snapped at her. Phoenix tried to struggle to her feet but gets kicked back down to the matt. Pain shot through her.

“Stupid bitch you broke my nose.” Dylan said kicking her again.

“Concede Phoenix.” Four said a little panic in his tone, but she doesn’t she tries to stand again and lunges at Dylan but he grabs her arm and punches her hard in the jaw. She feels dizzy and she blacks out falling on the matt hard. Dylan shoved her on her back and hit her hard again and again. She was now completely unconscious lying motionless on the mat.

“She can’t continue!” Eric said shoving Dylan out of the ring surprising the initiates even Four was surprised by Eric’s outburst. Phoenix’s friends rushed to her aide Nate picked her up and carried her to the infirmary. 

When Phoenix woke up a few hours later her body ached all over. She felt like she had been hit by a truck. She glanced over to see Amelia, Stage and Nate were sitting in chairs next to her bed. Amelia was fast asleep and Nate was writing something down. Amelia’s jaw was bruised, Nate had a black eye and Stages knuckles were more cut and bruised than the rest of theirs.

“What time is it?” Phoenix asked groggily trying to sit up.

“It’s late you missed dinner.” Nate said standing up “The nurse said you have a concussion and a broken rib we were worried you wouldn’t wake up”

“Come on Nate I wouldn’t give up that easy.” Phoenix smirked

“Phoenix your awake” Amelia smiled sleepily. 

“Glad to see your breathing I thought Dylan was going to kill you.” Stage said and A nurse walked into the room.

“Oh good you’re awake. Are you dizzy?” The nurse asked examining her.

“No I’m fine.” She answered.

“You took quite a beating if you need me let me know.” The nurse said walking out.

“Well this isn’t going to help my ranking any.” Phoenix sighed.

“You have two broken ribs, a broken nose and a concussion and you’re worried about your rank?” Amelia said rolling her eyes.

“You shouldn’t worry Eric and Four were more pissed at Dylan than you losing.” Stage said and Phoenix shot him a curious look.

“Why would they be pissed at him I lost he knocked me out the end.” Phoenix asked.

“You might not quite feel it because of the pain meds you’re on Nix but Dylan knocked you out and didn’t stop hitting you I mean half your face is pretty much red and purple.” Nate said. “Eric shoved him off of you and Four told him he was a coward I don’t think Dylan took it well.”

“well I’m excited to find a mirror.” Phoenix groaned “So How’d you two do Stage”

“Zack put up a bit of a fight but I won.” Stage grinned “And Nate pretty much beat the shit out of Ian.”

“Nix do us a favor though next time Four tells you to concede please fucking listen to him.” Nate said sighing.

“Can’t do that Nate I’m too dumb to give up.” Phoenix chuckled.

“Initiates leave.” Eric ordered walking into the room. Nate and Stage looked like they were going to argue with Eric but Amelia pulled him out of the room.

“Hello sunshine.” Phoenix said grinning.

“You’re out of dauntless” Eric says simply cold and cruel.

“Bullshit!” Phoenix snaps “You can’t just kick me out after one bad fight! It was only my second fight!” 

“I can because you can’t fight any more you are too injured. Generally initiates try not to get so many broken bones this early.” He shrugs.

“That’s total crap! Who are you to tell me I can’t fight? Isn’t that my decision?” She says standing up fighting the pain in her body she wasn’t going to stand down she’d fight   
Eric if she had to.] even if her head felt like it would explode.

“I’m a Dauntless leader I can toss you out anytime I want.” Eric growled “You can’t fight.” He had struck a nerve with her. Phoenix punched him hard in the jaw. Eric looked surprised but he hardly even flinched his hand went to his face and touched where she had hit him. He smirked darkly. He grabbed her hard and slammed her against the wall pain shooting through her body. 

“I will fight till I’m dead or you will have to throw me over the chasm or just kill me now because I’m not going down without a fight Eric I won’t be factionless.” Phoenix said gasping a little and Eric grins at her.

“I admire your courage initiate.” He said and she let out the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. “Get ready.” He said before letting her go and walking away.

Phoenix grabbed her stuff and made her way back to the initiate dorms everyone was gearing up for something. She stopped in the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. Amelia wasn’t wrong the right side of her face was bruised and swelling and her nose was bandaged and swollen. She groaned putting on her gear her ribs were wrapped up and sore. Phoenix barely even looked like herself.

“They’re letting you come tonight?” Amelia asked excitedly wearing the same vest and pants everyone else wore.

“Yes where are we going?” Phoenix asked and Amelia grinned.

“We have to be on the train in twenty minutes tonight’s war games.” She said leading Phoenix out of the room to the train tracks where Nate and the others.

When the train came the initiates started running Phoenix ran through the pain shooting through her body. She jumped up on the train and stumbled into something solid she gripped her side and groan touching the warm solid fabric form in front of her. She glance up when she realized she was clinging to a person, as lucky as she seemed to be this week that person was Eric. He looked annoyed a small bruise showing on his jaw.

“You ok Phoenix?” Four asked her pulling away from Eric quickly.

“I’m fine.” She huffs out catching her breath Eric rolls his eyes annoyed. When all the initiates boarded the train Four and Eric got ready to address them.

“Tonight is dauntless annual war games.” Four announces and Eric steps up.

“We’re playing capture the flag but with a twist.” He said and held up a gun “These are filled with Nero stim darts they have all the pain of a real bullet with half the fatality.   
Since you lost last year Four I’ll let you have first pick.”

“Phoenix.” Four says and Eric tenses a little.

“Putting a loud mouth on your team so you have someone to blame when you lose good idea” Eric says and Four just shrugs.  
Phoenix stood behind Four and watched them pick. Four was a big fan of underdogs he went with some of the smaller initiates well except for when he chose Dylan and Amelia. Eric went with Nate, Stage and a bunch of brutal looking Dauntless born. Phoenix examined her gun she was thrilled.

“Ok Four’s team is off the train first you’ll have 10 minutes to hide your flag and make up a game plan good luck.” Eric said with a smirk and Four jumped off the train his team following. 

They were let off in a small dark wooded area.

“So what’s the plan?” Amelia asked Four and he grinned.

“That’s up to you all to decide we’re a team.” Four said.

“I say we just hide the flag really well and all go after the other team.” Dylan said.

“Are you seriously suggesting we leave our flag unguarded?” A dauntless born guy named Kyle said and Dylan shrugged.

“I say we split into three teams the offense, defense and distraction.” Phoenix said and four smiled at her.

“Now we’re getting somewhere. Where are we putting the flag?” He said holding a glowing orange flag.

“We could hide it in the carousel. There are a lot of trees by it where we can hide.” Amelia piped out and the team agreed. 

“Amelia, Kyle and Max you’re going to come up with a distraction. Zyra, Nick and Alex will guard the flag and Phoenix, Dylan and I will retrieve it if we go down Amelia and Kyle can join and Max run back to base got it?” Four said and the group agreed letting the distraction team take the lead. 

Phoenix was tense she was sore and didn’t like the idea of being on the same team as Dylan who was now scowling at her but ignored him, she was alert. They dashed through the dark looking for any sign of Eric and his team. Phoenix heard voices and saw a dim glow of a flashlight she stopped the others and directed them towards the noises. 

“Are you fucking stupid turn off your flashlight.” Phoenix heard Eric growl and she grinned. Four spotted the flag through the window of an abandoned building. He directed Amelia, Kyle and Max to go towards the opposite way. When Phoenix Four, and Dylan heard the other team starts yelling they made their move.

“Phoenix you’re faster you go for the flag Dylan cover her I’ll cover you move fast and low.” Four ordered and the trio moved Four taking out anyone that noticed the trio. Phoenix climbed her way up the side of the building into the room. Dylan followed close behind Phoenix quickly pulled him in through the window easily ignoring the pain in her side she was having too much fun to care.

“All we have to do is run down the hall and we win.” Phoenix grinned at Dylan and took off towards the flag she had almost grabbed the flag when she felt excruciating pain in her back. She screamed in pain and She fell to the ground and looked for her assailant but the only person she saw was Dylan. 

“Did you seriously just shoot your fucking teammate in the back?” Eric asked venom in his voice. He came out of the shadows behind where the flag was placed. Eric lifted his gun and shot Dylan twice. Dylan dropped to the ground and screamed in pain. “Disgusting. Fucking. coward.” Eric said following each word with another shot Dylan’s screams rang through the small room.

“What the fuck happened?” Four asked climbing through the window looking down at Phoenix and Dylan who lay on the ground.

“This dumbfuck initiate seems to think shooting your fellow team mate is a good fucking idea.” Eric spat gesturing towards Dylan. The group stopped when they heard cheering the other team had gotten Four’s flag. 

“This loss is on you Dylan get up before I let Phoenix and Eric start shooting.” Four said helping Phoenix get the darts out of her back.

“Consider yourself at the bottom of the ranks Dylan.” Eric growled walking out of the room.

“Get out of my sight.” Four ordered Dylan. He left shooting daggers at Phoenix. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” Phoenix lied leaving the tower she wasn’t all that fine her body hurt like hell.  
The initiates followed behind Eric and Four, Eric’s team was celebrating and Four's team hung their heads in shame. Even Eric couldn’t help but sport a smug smile at his teams win over Four’s even if he was pissed at Dylan. When they finally got back to the compound the initiates went their separate ways celebrating and moping they all had the rest of the day off and all Phoenix wanted to do now was sleep.


End file.
